You know how cheated you feel when you put in all your trust in someone and they betray you. What do you do next?
Communicate with them on how they made you feel?
Absolutely not!
Take them to court?
Hell yeah!!!
This is the transcript from one such case. Remember the defendant is innocent until proven guilty.
Bailiff: All rise. *Judge enters. Please be seated.
Judge: Good morning, ladies and gentlemen. Calling the case of People of the State of California versus the Monarch Butterfly. Are both sides ready?
District Attorney: Ready for the People, Your Honor.
Defense Attorney: Ready for the defense, Your Honor.
District Attorney: Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury: the defendant has been charged with the crime of defrauding the public of California and other members of the Class Insecta. The evidence will show that the defendant is claiming to belong to the insect class despite having just 4 feet. The evidence I present will prove to you that the defendant is guilty as charged.
Defense Attorney: Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury: under the law my client is presumed innocent until proven guilty. During this trial, you will hear no substantial evidence against my client. My client belongs to a separate family in the Butterfly superfamily which has exempted them from using all 6 legs for walking. Therefore my client is not guilty.
- 3 pair of legs
- a pair of antennae
- 3 body parts i.e. head, thorax and abdomen
- an exoskeleton or a shell-like covering on the outside of the body
I am going to introduce Exhibit A to show proof that the Monarch Butterfly has 4 feet.
Defense Attorney: Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury, this case is not as simple as the prosecuting attorney has tried to make you believe. My client, the Monarch Butterfly belongs to the Butterfly Superfamily, but they branched into a separate family called Nymphalidae or the Brush-footed Butterflies more than 65 million years ago.
I would like to present Exhibit B which shows another specimen(Western pygmy blue Butterfly) of the same family having the same visible 4 feet structure.
District Attorney: I don't think it is fair to be still called an insect when you do not play with the same set of rules. We have so many hard working members of the Insect class that work tirelessly to gain recognition in the eyes of the public, but all they get is bug spray, shoe stamping or more hate. I would present Exhibit C to show one of the hard working members of the Insect Class showing all 6 feet and leading a sincere but rather underlooked and underappreciated life. I present you one of the Click Beetles in Exhibit C with 3 distinct pair of legs.
Defense Attorney: Objection, your honor.
Judge: Sustained. Please do not try to bring up the issue of native and non-native gardening which is not pertinent to this case.
District Attorney: No further questions, Your Honor.
Defense Attorney: That is simply not true when the District Attorney alleged that my client and every member of this Brush-footed Butterfly family just has 4 legs. You see, each of them have 3 pairs of legs. The reason they are termed Brush-footed is because the front two legs are curled up besides the eyes. They have replaced the feet with the brushes of hair which helps them taste and smell food.
As shown in Exhibit D, you can see the reduced forelegs besides the eyes.
Judge: You may proceed with closing arguments.
District Attorney: Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury: We live in a world where people will judge on what they see at first sight. No one has the time to sit down and observe when we are always rushing to do things and accumulate more and more Instagram likes before we hit the grave. In these scenarios, the defendant makes things harder for people to observe the missing legs and might construe that it has evil intentions and hence wants to hide its forelegs. Based on the evidence, you must find the defendant guilty.
Defense Attorney: Your Honor, ladies and gentlemen of the jury: The monarch butterfly provides so much joy to adults and kids alike, the defendant is primarily the reason why a lot of nonprofits get their funding and it would be a shame to not classify them as insects and thus separate them from such a powerful class. The Monarch butterfly does not deliberately hide its forelegs, it is just evolution playing a role in making all species unique from each other, thus ensuring their survival. Also as shown in the evidence presented by the defense, it clearly shows the forelegs, just not visible for the folks who are in the rush to stand in line outside the supermarket or Starbucks.
District Attorney: Please do justice today and find the Monarch Butterfly guilty of fraud.
Judge: Ladies and gentlemen of the jury, it is your job to decide whether the Monarch Butterfly is guilty of fraud. If found guilty, the monarch butterfly may be stripped off the privilege of being called an insect.
....After 10 mins of deliberation, the jury reached a verdict......
Judge: Will the jury foreperson please stand? Has the jury reached a unanimous verdict?
Foreperson: Yes
Clerk: The jury finds the defendant not guilty.
Judge: The jury is thanked and excused. Court is adjourned.
*The monarch butterfly quickly flies away towards the nearest milkweed plant.
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